Single people; do you have close friends who are married?
It’s 1991. My friend Renee and I are both single. We talk freely on the phone with no time limitation. And about once a month, we get together to hang out. We even fly south to one of the islands for a vacation.
Two years later…I began to seriously date G. He’s in another city and I don’t see him every weekend, but still, “hanging out” has lost its appeal. Renee and I keep the phone conversations going, but she begins to sense that it isn’t the same.
I get married. Renee and I maintain our friendship, now spanning two states, but the calls are decreasing…a lot.
Then, she gets married!
The calls pick up – a little – because we have “the marriage thing” in common.
It’s a few years later. She gets divorced. Her time is “all” hers again.
But now I have three children!
I also have several new friends from play group, piano lessons, church, the elementary school, etc. My phone time is all but gone.
Renee and I are down to talking once or twice a year.
In one of our conversations, she says something I’ll always remember. “You’re married with children. Married people just don’t have much time for their single friends. It’s okay; your life is different now.”
What can I say? She’s right. It’s not intentional though.
So, single friends – I thank you for caring about me and keeping our friendship alive via your initiated phone calls and emails. I feel awkward for not calling you much. Just keep in mind that my children will not always be children, and my husband is okay with a “girls” outing – the time will come…or will it?
How do you maintain friendships with single people?
Or, if you’re single, how do you maintain friendships with married people or people in committed relationships?
Have you read the previous post titled Money? It includes some "very good" comments from the followers and readers on how they handle the income of their household - some one income families; others, two or more.