Friday, October 8, 2010

Breasts

Yes - women’s breasts. The girls seem to be coming at’cha from everywhere nowadays. The teens are displaying their firmness with the help of underwire and push up bras (as if they need it) which gives them the appearance of having a little butt sitting on their chests; or like a couple of flesh colored round fruits popping out of their camis.

The women are not to be outdone, donning tight, low cut tops and dresses, too. They have more of the appearance of falling into their bras and then shortening the straps for a lift, but the results are pretty impressive.

The pointed bra that made women look like they had two half footballs on their chest is gone, and so is the jiggly, no-bra look. Apparently, smooth and round is in!

While many women are obsessing over the size of their breasts, wanting to be big and full and abounding with cleavage - some choosing the help of implants - there are others who could care less. My girlfriend is in that category. Having large breasts since childhood, she was done with them and decided to have breast reduction surgery.

When she first mentioned it, I understood. Size GG on a short, small woman is big. No matter how good her bras were, and how well she packed them in, successfully achieving her sophisticated and well-dressed look, her breasts were always center stage.

Prior to the surgery, most women wanted to know, “What size are you going down to?” and “How’s your husband going to feel about your smaller breasts?”

Those issues were not her concern. The pain in her back was. The inability to wear a dress was. Fitting her breasts meant the dress was going to be too big at the shoulders and too big at the bottom.

My friend let her surgeon decide her new size; a “balanced look” is what she asked for.

Still in the healing process, I asked her if she thinks back to what she used to look like, or if she’s used to her new body.

“I just think about the problems I had – like when I cleaned the tub, I felt like I had udders hitting against it. And, I hated the moisture under them that would start to smell if left too long.”

Those are things I never thought about. As a member of the barely B club, I haven't experienced physical discomfort (besides breastfeeding issues). Other issues, like being teased and not filling out the swimsuit top have been the extent of it, but I've never wanted implants.

It’s amazing how two little (or big) mounds of flesh can be so all-encompassing; how it can be the determinant for security or insecurity, for a pain free back, for looking “good” in clothes, for attracting mates, etc.

I’m proud of my friend for having the surgery. For her, it was the right thing to do.

For others, whether you’re in a training bra or any letter of the alphabet, the bottom line is – they’re yours. Do what’cha wanna do with’em! :)

But definitely do this: take care of them. Breast health is very important. Have your mammograms on schedule and do your self-examinations. Consult your doctors for advice and recommendations. Please.
.
No question for this post: just say whatever comes to your mind. :)

30 comments:

Cindy - Letters From Midlife said...

Great post! I've always been pretty average but I have a friend who had the reduction surgery and is so glad she did.

I try not to judge but frankly I'm tired of seeing everyone else's "girls" on display so much when it seems inappropriate. I expect to see more body at a beach but not so much when I'm at the grocery store or church! lol I guess I'm just old fashioned and remember what my grandma used to say: Don't advertise what isn't for sale.

Tammy said...

Good post! I'm also tired of the trend to show more cleavage. It's to the point where I start guessing if they are "real" or not. lol Thanks for stopping by today. To answer your question, yes, my daughter is very talented. She received a scholarship to SCAD (big art college) but did she go there? Nooo...She has spent a good portion of her life trying to be unlike me but I see the gap closing. We're hoping to one day open a mother-daughter shop/decorating business after she graduates with her business degree.
Have a happy weekend!

Tammy@ A Doctor in the House said...

oops..me again. Didn't want to go without saying thank you for the compliment. You're too kind. I don't consider myself that talented. There are so many talented people here in blog land. I guess with all the moving I've done it has given me a lot of practice in decorating. xxoo tammy

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

I had a friend that also had the reduction surgery. I was happy for her because the guys were always oogling her and she couldn't tell whether they were attracted to her or her boobs. Her back was constantly hurting her as well.

I like that you said, "no matter what size you are..." I'm not stuck on the size, as long as they don't end up in my socks at the end of the day! :)

Sohailah said...

You are funny! I've always been fine with mine, and never received any comments, either way... Between a B and a C, I think. But - I DO wear padded - seems my girls like to stand at attention a lot, and it's a bit embarrassing at work, and all. Particularly when I taught high school...

Aging Mommy said...

I can totally understand your friend wanting surgery - for someone short that is a lot to carry around and being stared at, feeling self conscious etc as well as the health related problems you detailed, all are reasons to want to make a change.

I am a 30DD and have always been fine more or less, but given a choice I would choose to be a little smaller.

Marla @ Always Nesting said...

Good reminder!

ITA with Cindy! I always wonder why some feel it necessary to let it all hang out.

gayle said...

Great post and great way to remind us to check our breasts!!

Karen said...

This is a great post. I have a friend who had reduction surgery and is much healthier because of it. No more back pain. Something a lot of people don't think about.

It is so frustrating to bra shop with my 13-year-old daughter. She hates the push ups and padded bras, and it's hard to find styles without those features in the teen department. It makes me so angry. What kind of message are we sending to our daughters?

Grumpy Old Ken said...

Should I be reading this. I notice no other male comment! seriously, you young 'moderns' are a great improvement on the old days.

Abby said...

Wonderful post for October!

As a fellow member of the barely B's - and who am I kidding - closer to A+ than B-, I've often "sized myself up" to other women. Implants were never an option, though.

But I have had friends such as yours whom I could live vicariously through, and it wasn't all it was cleaved up to be. They mentioned the same issues: the discomfort, the clothing hassles, and the feeling of being overshadowed by their boobs. Not to mention the surprisingly insensitive remarks from perfect strangers. Good for her!

Buckeroomama said...

I have "Goldilocks" girls --just right. For me. I wish all women can feel this way about themselves. Sometimes it's tough to have a healthy body image when we are bombarded with media images of the "ideal" body.

yonca said...

Great reminder Anita! I don't have big breast but I understand your friend..I think, she did the right thing to decide to surgery.
When I was in high school, I used to complain that my breast were small.
But after I gave birth to my son,I noticed that they are big enough..hehe.:)

Hilary said...

I have a friend who got implants as a gift to herself after a divorce. She raved that her doctor was a phenom with all surgeries, not just breasts, though hers were top notch (her words, not mine). I told her I might consult her doctor about a tummy tuck, and she said, "What about your breasts?" I said, "What about them?". My breasts aren't perfect, but I like them just fine. If anyone wants to get implants or a reduction, do your research first, and please make sure you're doing it for the right reasons, not because you're trying to please someone else.

Jenny said...

I admire your friend for making herself feel better. That seems like it would be uncomfortable.

I get tired of the breast display everywhere. It used to be just in Vegas - ha - but now I see 'them' at the grocery store, too!

ModernMom said...

Another member of the barely B club..and I am fine with that!
So many girls with big ones want them smaller. Got small ones...need them bigger. I'm with you. I just want health ones:)

Fragrant Liar said...

A pointed post about our breastes. ;-) I think women should get bigger breasts if they want them or smaller ones if they want them. Or make no changes at all. Only we have the right to judge ourselves on the breast issue. We make changes for all sorts of reasons and they're all okay (as long as body dysmorphia is not an issue). Our breasts are our personal business, so long as, like you say, everything is healthy.

SuziCate said...

I've had many friends who've had back and shoulder issues due to large breasts. As envious as I am of larger breasted women, I honestly don't know what I'd do with them if I had them! I think they'd just be in my way!

My name is PJ. said...

I crack up that all these women buy into larger breasts being the way to a happier you. We live in a crazy, superficial society.

Mammograms are a must.

Jen said...

No, I'm not writing a novel, LOL. My life really is this insane and I don't even tell you guys everything.

When I finally do write my novel, I'll have plenty of material.

I can't imagine having breasts that large. If I was any larger, I'd have a hard time running so I'm perfectly happy with what I have. Guess I'm in the minority there.

Just Two Chicks said...

Well, I have to admit, mine aren't large. What I've got, I've only had these past few years after gaining some weight. This makes me hesitant to work out too much for fear of losing what I finally have. I didn't get anything when I was pregnant! It was so bad I couldn't even breast feed.

Like you, I had never really thought about the discomfort that could come from breasts that are "too large," and would rather worry about losing the small amount I have, than having to surgically reduce. I'm glad your friend was able to have this done and is now comfortable with herself.

As far as breast health, it's very important to get your yearly check-ups and also to do your own shower checks. I stopped doing those for a long time after finding a lump that they finally decided was an enlarged lymph node. No idea why, but it's still enlarged.

Thanks for the comments... I've only just gotten caught up with things. It's been a little nuts around here now that everyone is back to their regularly scheduled activities. :)

Farila said...

I feel proud of the decision your friend made and appreciate the way you put it out here.
I remember my grandma who had sort of huge breasts.. I used to wonder how discomforting it could be.

I had never been unhappy with my 36C but then came breast cancer...and it is totally different story after that.

Rebecca S. said...

Except for a brief period when I was young, I have always been happy to have smaller breasts. It just makes everything easier. I don't need to have bra fittings or buy expensive bras, I can run without pain and the boing, boing effect, and I am never uncomfortable (except when I was nursing and leaking). So I don't blame your friend.
I was trying to buy my thirteen year old daughter some tank tops and everything was so low-cut. I was pretty frustrated. I also wonder about the effect on breast health if we are lifting and squeezing our breasts to such a degree. I think it can't be good.

Julie Magers Soulen said...

This is a great post for October breast cancer awareness. Yep, we come in all sizes, but no matter the size we all need to self check and get those annuals. Thanks Anita!

Cheers!
Julie
Julie Magers Soulen Photography

Midlife Mom said...

I guess I am from the old school but I think some things should be covered up and not out there for the world to see. My DIL suffered with big girls until she had the reduction surgery and she said it was the best thing she ever did for herself. Her Mom soon followed and then her sister and they all are much happier. Great post!!!

Sohailah said...

Don't know if you have time, or do this sort of thing, but I tagged you on my blog. Happy Friday!

Pink said...

*run and give you a big long hug*

Hi Anitaaaa! I missed you too! :D
I missed reading your thoughtful posts especially..

Breast. Hmmm.. *peering down*
Thank God for my average size. I have no difficulty to do and to wear anything. I think it all back to how we appreciate and be grateful for ourselves completely. Just stop comparing ourself with other person, and try to live happy and healthy. ;)

xxx

Dorraine said...

I think "the girls" are highly over rated.

I completely understand your friends desire to have reductions surgery. Good for her! My sister had the same thing, and she's so much happier. And her poor back doesn't ache anymore.

I tried to wear a push-up bra last weekend for a fancy little gig we were going to, but I just felt weird in the thing. It looked unatural on me. I've never been one to show what I have even when I have it!

Paul C said...

Why was I drawn into your post?... Great writing!

Flory said...

Appropriate post for October Anita! I know someone who had breast reduction done. In addition to the back pain, she felt that they made her look fatter. It was weird seeing her after she had them done, but eventually we all forgot about it.

Thanks for stopping by my blog.