Time to Move On

I ran into a friend who I hadn’t seen in a while. We chatted five minutes, trying to cover major happenings in our lives, one of which was her status as a teacher. “I don’t teach anymore,” she said, “It was time to move on.”

During the last year, I’ve been struggling with a decision—nothing major—nevertheless, difficult. It’s my horseback riding lessons. It’ll be five years this September since I first climbed up onto Echo, a lean horse whose height may be 17 hands. Looking down at the ground gave me a feeling of being SO high up and I was slightly nervous; however, before the lesson was over, I knew I’d be back.

Being on the farm gives me a temporary transformation from life that is surrounded by computers, dishes, cars, houses, buildings and highways, to that of a farm house, barns, pasture, woods and animals. Many times I have rushed to get there, but sometime between grooming and tacking the horse, and mounting it, tranquility enters my body. Starting in the two-point position, I stretch my legs and torso as my horse’s gait is a leisurely walk. Soon, the gait changes to a trot in the ring where I have been taught to ride on the correct diagonal. Further in the lesson, I canter. If the mulch footing is not wet from rain, I do some jumping. And then there are days when we skip all of that and head into the woods for a trail ride.

Is it time to give it up and move on?

Getting dressed in my riding “blue jeans,” struggling with my half chaps, cutting carrots for horse treats, gathering my helmet, sunglasses, water bottle, the check book, and jacket and gloves if it’s winter, takes time. Then there’s the 23 minute ride, the lesson, playing with the animals, and the ride back—two to two and half hours of my day. My lesson is only once a week (though rain and other things limit me to 3 times a month), but still, lately it feels like it takes a major chunk of time away from the long list of other things to do. I’m torn between staying and leaving.

Why? Because I can become a better rider and because I enjoy it? Yes. But will I ever feel that it’s complete; that there is nothing more to learn? No.

This little story and example can represent most things in life. How long do you stay at the same job? Do you move from your house to a retirement community or assisted living? Do you send your adult children out into the world on their own? Do you let go of the person you love or used to love because he or she is making your life miserable? Do you stop breastfeeding your baby or toddler?

Why is it hard to make changes? Not all changes, of course, but so many. Nostalgia perhaps; or fear? Nostalgia is not a problem for me, as I tend to appreciate much of my past, but want to grow and experience the mystery of my future. Fear? Hmmm… What happens if I quit my lessons? Nothing (convincing myself), because if I miss it terribly, I take lessons again. Right?

Everything changes—whether you make the decision to move on or the decision is made for you. And much of the time, it’s replaced with something just as satisfying.

Do you have a decision to make about something that’s hanging over your head? Is it time to move on? Care to share?

Other thoughts?

Below are the lyrics to a song that I seldom hear nowadays, but one that I love hearing when I do. The composer is Bernard Ighner and it has been recorded by a several artists—George Benson and Barbra Streisand being two of them.

"Everything Must Change"

Everything must change
Nothing stays the same

Everyone must change
No one stays the same

The young become the old
And mysteries do unfold
Cause that's the way of time
Nothing and no one goes unchanged

There are not many things in life
You can be sure of
Except rain comes from the clouds
Sun lights up the sky
And hummingbirds do fly

Winter turns to spring
A wounded heart will heal
But never much too soon
Yes everything must change

The young become the old
And mysteries do unfold
Cause that's the way of time
Nothing and no one goes unchanged

There are not many things in life
You can be sure of
Except rain comes from the clouds
Sun lights up the sky
And butterflies do fly

Rain comes from the clouds
Sun lights up the sky
And music
And music
Makes me cry